


The Most Wonderful Time of The Year

by CynicalRainbows



Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: Cathy is anxious, Christmas Fluff, Fluff, Found Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 11:14:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28509513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CynicalRainbows/pseuds/CynicalRainbows
Summary: In the build up the Christmas, Cathy finds she is less than excited at the prospect.(Or: I project my own feelings about Christmas onto the queens)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 28





	The Most Wonderful Time of The Year

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Evenatango](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evenatango/gifts).



> This is entirely a projection- I was utterly dreading Christmas this year. Unlike Cathy, I also had some pretty stressful family stuff going on but like Cathy, I was absolutely dreading the idea of spoiling the day. The writing of this is entirely down to my wonderful girlfriend, who has patiently allowed me to be as miserable as I like, a gesture of love rarely fully appreciated.

9.00am, Christmas Eve.

Cathy rolled onto her side and pulled the duvet up over her head. Maybe if she just lay really still, they’d forget her and-

“Merry Almost-Christmas Cathy!”

Damn.

She mumbled something that could be construed as a vaguely cheerful greeting and buried her head in her pillow.

Christmas Eve morning, and she was already wishing it was over.

She hadn’t hated Christmas in her first life- in fact, she’d rather enjoyed the break in routine. Some of the traditions- the yule log, watching the mummers, the wassail cup- reminded her pleasantly of childhood and other, more court based traditions- the boars head, the bear baiting, the elaborate feasting and revelry- were, if not always fun, a welcome distraction.

The prospect of experiencing Christmas in the 21st century though felt somehow less of a pleasure and more of a cruel reminder of happier times past, and, increasingly, like an obligation, a test which she was sure to fail.

_ (“Looking forward to Christmas? Only a week to go!”) _

Had it always been like this? It was harder to remember, but she was sure that Christmas in her first life hadn’t been so relentlessly  _ cheery. _ There had been a holiday mood, of course, there had been a general sense of goodwill and of course the expectation that one would enter into any amusement going….but she was sure that the insidious pressure to exist in a near-constant state of happiness and warmth and merriment was but another cursed 21st century invention.

_ (“It’s the most wonderful time of the year! It’s...well, it’s just magical!”) _

Back in her youth, one was expected to enter into the spirit of things, of course….but the heavy religious element on the holiday had at least added a welcome breath of sobriety to the proceedings, and there was, of course, always the opportunity to takes oneself off to the quietness of the chapel or to ones prayer closet for a moment of peace, with the excuse of being overcome by religious fervour on the holiest of days. 

_ (“Such a happy time- the build up is so exciting!”) _

Now though… She was sure it wasn’t intentional, but she’d definitely got the impression that wanting, let alone needing a break from the festivities marked one out as a decidedly unpleasant and miserly person.

_ (“How can you not be excited? It’s Christmas! Don’t be such a grinch!”) _

“Cathy? Are you awake?”

Cathay fought the urge to pretend to still be sleeping. She wished she hadn’t answered Anna.

“I’ll be down in a minute Jane!”

She looked at her watch. Just another 48 hours to go.

*

Downstairs, Cathy slipped into her usual place and reached for the coffee. 

_ What’s even wrong? Nothing. Nothing is wrong. You’re fine Cathy. You have no reason to feel like this. Nothing is wrong at all. You have no reason to feel sick and like you can’t breathe. None at all. _

Catalina passed behind her with a plate of toast, pausing to drop a kiss on the top of her head.

“Good morning mija.”

“Now that you’re down-” Jane started, “I thought we could discuss what we wanted to have for Christmas breakfast.”

Anne raised an eyebrow. “It’s Christmas dinner that’s the special meal Jane. Turkey, remember?”

Jane huffed a little. “Yes I KNOW, BUT it’s apparently a Thing to have a special breakfast too. Belinda in the sound crew told me- she and her family have croissants. What should we have?”

“Waffles!” said Kitty, at the exact same moment that Anna cried “Eierkuchen!”

Across the table, Anne’s slightly anxious eyes met Cathy’s.

“What’s wrong with what we usually have for breakfast?” Cathy asked tentatively. She did her best to make the question sound light, innocuous.

_ You’re not being a funsponge, you’re just curious. _

Jane shook her head. “It’s meant to be  _ special,  _ she said.”

“Yeah,” added Kitty. “Everyday stuff isn’t special. And even if no one else wants waffles, I’m still making them,” she added, a touch defiantly, as she took another bite of cereal.

“I suppose not….”

She didn’t want to make a fuss.

She also didn’t know if it was possible to find a way to explain that she wasn’t thrilled at the idea of having to have a different breakfast, without sounding impossibly dull.

She and Anne had already had more than one whispered conversation about how neither of them was really looking forward to the planned ‘modern’ Christmas dinner.

_ (“I’ve had turkey….it’s sort of like chicken. Sort of...drier and not as nice tasting…” “And Christmas pudding looks….odd. The texture-”) _

They’d agreed to stick it out for the sake of the other queens, to make sure they ate breakfast and then to just eat what they could of the Christmas dinner. Not that Cathy was holding out much hope for that- she knew Anne seldom could face the idea of food when she was under stress and Christmas certainly counted as ‘a stressful time’.

“It’s all the focus on children-” She’d explained. “All the focus on Christmas being  _ for the children _ , whatever that means. I can’t  _ not  _ think about Elizabeth and….well, all of that-” 

“Plus the lights-” Cathy agreed, and Anne nodded frantically. 

“Yes! Those awful lights EVERYWHERE flashing enough to give anyone within five miles a migraine, and those horrible songs being played…”

They’d laughed, then, over the horrible assault on the senses that modern Christmas seemed to be but now Cathy didn’t feel much like laughing.

Since early November, leaving the house had felt like a mild sensory assault, and since Jane and Kitty had put the decorations up in December, this had encroached into her own home. 

Anne disliked it too, she knew, but neither felt like they could say anything.

(“After all-” Anne had remarked rather gloomily, “-not liking Christmas lights is definitely meant to be a warning sign…”

“What do you mean?”

“In all the films!” Anne gestured impatiently. “It’s always the boring awful secretly-evil person who hates the Christmas lights and the tree and everything else, and the nice, good person who likes it! And I don’t  _ want _ to have to be the one who spoils everything and everyone is mildly suspicious of again!”

“I definitely shouldn’t have let you binge watch all those Christmas films with Kitty…”

“I’m right though.” Anne eyed her seriously. “You know I am.”

Cathy had nodded. She knew.)

Catalina had taken note of her goddaughters increased irritability, the worsening of her already poor sleeping pattern and tried to gently probe as to the cause but Cathy had brushed her off. She knew that Christmas could _ easily _ be painful to Catalina for exactly the same reason that it troubled Anne, and she’d be damned if she was the one to ruin the Christmas of the person she owed so much too.

_ (“Are you sure you’re alright mija? You know you can always talk to me.” _

_ She’d flashed a smile and surreptitiously moved away. “I’m fine Catty. Really.”) _

And she’d convinced herself that she  _ was _ fine, that she  _ could be _ fine, that she could  _ keep on _ being fine right up to Boxing Day. Now though as the day drew closer, she could feel anxiety gnawing at her stomach every day, from the moment she woke up to the moment she would eventually drift into an uneasy sleep.

There was no denying it- she knew she’d never be able to keep up the level of excitement and jollity obviously required for Christmas day and she was dreading the moment that she spoilt it for the others.

Would they be upset if she couldn’t face the thought of unfamiliar food first thing in the morning? They’d certainly be upset if she didn’t enjoy Christmas dinner- they’d all gone to so much trouble making sure the dinner was perfect. 

What if she didn’t look grateful enough for her presents? And she knew that games were meant to be a big part of Christmas day too but not knowing how to play, not knowing what was expected of her, made her anxious even on good days- what if she ruined the fun for the others?

She was dreading it so much, she would have given everything she owned to move past Christmas day and just get straight on with the frustration and irritation on behalf of the other queens that she was sure was coming. 

That was, of course, if they didn’t go straight in with anger…

“Cathy?” Kitty’s concerned voice broke through her thoughts. “Are you ok?”

She plastered on another smile. “Fine!”

It wasn’t exactly a lie. She kept on being fine as Kitty and Anna squabbled over whether they’d make pancakes or waffles their Christmas breakfast, as they jockeyed with each other to lay presents under the tree, as they went out for the last bits of Christmas shopping and settled in to watch a festive film.

It was only after they all retired to their respective rooms that Cathy allowed the tension to slowly seep out of her body. She leant for a moment against her closed door and then flopped, fully dressed, onto the duvet.

And when the faint strains of “Wonderful Christmas Time” drifted up to her bedroom window from the street below, the tears that she’d been holding back for nearly two months finally fell.

*

“Cath?”

A faint tapping caught her ears and she froze.

As quietly as she could, she reached for a tissue to dry her face- finding none, she scrubbed her eyes with her sleeve instead. 

She could  _ feel  _ Jane wincing as she did.

“Y-yeah?”

She willed her voice not to crack but it did anyway, of course.

Catalina’s voice was buttery-soft. “Are you alright mija?”

Anne’s voice, in a loud whisper, drifted through the crack in the door. “Don’t  _ ask _ her, why would you  _ ask _ her, she’ll just say no and- OW, that  _ hurt _ !”

“Cathy, can we come in please?” 

It would have been easier to brush off Catalina’s loving concern or Anne’s blunt request for entry but Kitty always sounded so  _ hopeful _ that saying no to her somehow felt harder than saying no to the others. She knew she wasn’t the only one- the others had all discussed it, and eventually had come to the conclusion that as it didn’t appear to be in any way deliberate, they couldn’t really ask Kitty to stop, annoyingly inconvenient as it was.

She couldn’t say no, but she didn’t say yes either, so she just snuffled as quietly as possible and hoped they’d go away.

“Cath?”

They didn’t.

She knew she was merely delaying the inevitable but she couldn’t help but try anyway.

“What is it?”

“Can we come in and talk to you please Cath? We’re worried and we want to check that you’re ok.” 

She would have hated Anna for her bluntness if she could, but she couldn’t- it was impossible to even mildly dislike Anna, and she’d yet to find anyone able to manage it. It continued to baffle her that Henry had been able to keep it up- Kitty had once asked, in exasperation, if Anna had just been _too_ easygoing and _too_ patient and _too_ kind, and Cathy had had to agree.

“We heard you crying-” Anne chipped in helpfully, “-and- OW, Jane what the fuck is your problem?!”

Even in her slightly tearstained state, Cathy couldn’t help smiling a little.

“You can come in if you want...” 

She’d rather hoped that only one would accept the invitation but of course they all piled in anyway, Anne still rubbing her crushed foot and Jane looking a little too innocent.

Catalina immediately came over to the side of the bed and sat down on the edge, as Anne scrambled up on her other side.

“Are you alright mija?”

“Who do I need to kill Cath?”

The two utterly incongruent enquiries from her two favourite people in the world made her laugh, even as her eyes burned with fresh tears. They were so lovely- they were all so lovely-and here she was completely ruining what was meant to be a special day for them.

She shook her head. 

“Nothing. I’m fine.” She forced a smile onto her face. “Honestly.”

None of them looked remotely convinced; out of the corner of her eye, she could see Kitty sending urgent telegrams to Anne and Anna biting her lip.

“Love-” Jane came over and sat next to Catalina. Her hand on Cathy’s was very warm. “You know we’d never make you talk unless you were ready, but do you think you could give us a vague idea of what it is? Just-” She glanced at the others, “I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m going to be thinking up all sorts of horrible things otherwise and-”

“It’s nothing, honestly-” 

“Mija anything that makes you this upset on Christmas Eve is clearly nothing.”

Cathy knew Catalina meant it kindly but the words cut her deeper than any order to pull herself together would have done. It was Christmas Eve and here she was, making the others worry about her, overshadowing their night with her selfishness-

“It’s ok Cath-” Kitty, closely followed by Anna, climbed up onto the remaining space at the foot of the bed and, after realising that Cathy’s hands were already claimed, gently squeezed her foot. “Whatever it is, we’ll deal with it. Right?”

The others wholehearted murmured agreement just made Cathy feel worse.

“You’re all so  _ nice _ -” she eventually managed. “You’re so sweet and I’m spoiling everything, and I’m ruining Christmas and-”

There was an immediate chorus of disagreement:

“You’re not ruining anything mija-”

“It’s all ok love-”

“Please don’t cry Cath-”

“Please tell us what’s wrong?”

They all looked so earnest she just couldn’t bear it- she took a breath.

“I’m sorry. Really, honestly, nothing is wrong. I just…” She tried to think of how to phrase it in a way that didn’t make her seem utterly joyless. “I’m just….struggling a bit, I think.”

“With work? Or death-day stuff or-”

She shook her head. “With Christmas.”

Catalina squeezed her hand. “You miss the old traditions mija?”

“Not exactly. Or-” Cathy tilted her head. “Not that much. It’s not really that I’m homesick for anything, I just…” She sighed. “I’m afraid I’m going to ruin it for you all. More than I have already, of course.”

“What do you mean?” Anne looked confused. “How would you ruin it?”

“By not doing it right….or not feeling how I should feel.” Cathy looked around at the women clustered around her. “I’m sorry- I know how much it means to you all. And I promise I’m not trying to be a drag on purpose. I just… I’m scared I’m going to ruin it for you all by being….not happy or not festive or just….not whatever it is you’re meant to be on Christmas. I won’t be enough and-”

“You could never not be enough for us querida!” 

Suddenly Cathy was being enveloped in at least three pairs of arms.

“But it’s Christmas!”

Kitty shrugged. “So?”

“But you’re all so excited! I don’t want to spoil it for you!”

“But it’s just a  _ day-” _

“It’s not that important-”

“Cathy-” Anna knelt in front of her. “Nothing you do is going to spoil it, ok? We love  _ you _ , we care about  _ you _ . If you’re sad on Christmas, we’ll be sad because you’re unhappy. Not because it’ll be ruining the day or whatever.”

“But-”

“Ok how about this?” Anna considered. “What about we all promise to not base the success of Christmas Day on your emotional state- or on anyone else's? Does that help?”

“Hold up-” Kitty raised a hand. “When did we all agree that the rest of us were going to be super happy and festive all day? Is that a thing? Do we have to all-” She waved a hand, “-festive all day? Can we just be normal instead?”

“Yeah-” Anne agreed. She turned to the others. “I just want to put this out there- obviously I don’t want to ruin the day for you all either. But….I’m struggling a bit too.” She ducked her head and tugged a little at a loose thread in Cathy’s bedspread. “So if I do end up being a massive drag, I’m- I’m really sorry-”

“Love!” Jane leant precariously over Cathy’s legs to pull Anne into her arms. “You won’t! It’s ok-”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Kitty asked. “If I’d known you were both so worried, I’d have told you not to worry- we  _ all  _ would have.”

“But you were so excited and-”

Kitty blinked at Anne. “I mean yeah? But it’s just a day, it’s not like there’ll never be another one- and even if there wasn’t I’d still care more about  _ you _ than about some random day of celebration.”

The others nodded.

Catalina shook her head. “I’m so sorry I didn’t realise you were so miserable, if I’d known-”

“It’s not your fault.” Cathy avoided her godmother's eyes. “I didn’t want to….to make you think about Christmas being difficult, I didn’t want to remind you of….”

She trailed off. Catalina looked at her for a long moment, then she shook her head.

“Oh mija. Did you really think that you could keep me from remembering…” She too couldn’t quite bring herself to say it. “I know you’re clever but I think you’ve giving yourself much too much credit there…”

Said out loud, it sounded very foolish to Cathy- she could feel herself blushing. Catalina pulled her close again and she took the opportunity to hide her burning cheeks for a moment against her godmother's cardigan.

“I’m sorry, I just thought….”

“I know. And it was very, very sweet of you. But really mija-” Catalina’s hand smoothed back her hair. “Really, we  _ all _ have our reasons to find Christmas difficult. And even if we deal with them in different ways, that doesn’t mean anyone would be upset with anyone else because of it. Jane, for example-” Everyone looked at Jane, who blushed slightly under their collective gaze. “Jane’s more into it, you and Anne, not so much and that’s ok, that’s-”

She broke off. Jane was twisting her fingers together anxiously and looking very uncomfortable.

“Jane? Are you ok?”

“I’m sorry!” Jane suddenly burst out, looking anguished. “I didn’t mean to make you all feel so pressured to enjoy it! I just- they all say it’s meant to be the Mum who makes Christmas and I thought that if I didn’t, you’d all be disappointed and upset with me and…. And all along I’ve been making you all feel worse! I’m SO sorry, I-”

Anna slung an arm around Jane’s shoulders and pulled her into a side hug.

“Janey no, don’t feel bad! We’re all really appreciative of what you’ve been doing-”

Cathy and Anne nodded fervently. “It wasn’t YOU Jane, I promise-”

Catalina put her head on one side. “What did you mean by us being upset with you though? You didn’t really think that, did you?”

Jane ducked her head. “Well….yes? Isn’t it meant to be the Mum who sorts stuff out?”

“Jane, we keep telling you-” Anne reached over Cathy to squeeze Jane’s hand. “The Mum Friend label is a joke- you’re 29 for goodness sake! It’s a loving testament to how lovely you are  _ of course _ . But it’s not an obligation! Of course we’d never expect you to be responsible for Christmas!”

Kitty nodded. “I’m really happy we’re having a proper christmas but I didn’t realise you thought we expected it of you…Did you not want to do any of it really?”

Jane shrugged and blushed. “I….don’t know. I like the tree-”

“You’re welcome” said Anna, a touch smugly.

“-and the presents and it’ll be nice to have a special dinner….but also, it’s sort of a relief? To not to have to worry? I was SO afraid if something went wrong that you’d all be really upset and blame me…”

Catalina sighed.

“It looks like we’ve all suffered from lack of communication…. Can I propose that we maybe seek a...an alternative plan for Christmas day?”

“Hm?”

“An entirely opt-in Christmas.” Catalina explained. “I don’t think we really have to choose between striving for the unobtainable picture perfect day, or completely forgoing it….do we?”

“Yeah,” said Anna. “I’m still looking forward to a nice dinner and stuff. Can’t we just do the bits we want to do, but also just agree that if anyone doesn’t want to join in, that’s ok?”

“Or-” Kitty added, “-if they do, it’s ok to just….be however you’re feeling. No particular emotional expression required.”

Cathy smiled at her gratefully. Then she glanced over at Anne, who met her eyes questioningly. She decided she’d do it- for Anne, she told herself.

“Um- just while we’re on the subject…” She addressed herself to Kitty and Jane. “Would it be ok...I’m only saying it since we’re already talking about it and i don’t want to be really ungrateful or anything but….”

“I think what she’s trying to say is-” Anne cut in, “-would it mess things up too much if we made the special breakfast opt-in too? Just-”

She was cut off before she could even carry on explaining by Jane. 

“Of course! Why ever wouldn’t you?”

“Well you said-”

“Oh!” Jane looked guilt stricken. “I did, didn’t I? I swear I never meant-”

“It’s fine!” Cathy cut Jane off before she could spiral too far. “You were suggesting something lovely and it’s appreciated! We know you didn’t mean anything by it, we just want to make sure that we won’t be spoiling anything if we-”

“Of course!” Jane nodded emphatically. “We don’t have to have a different breakfast of course, I was only-’”

Anna held up her hand. “Before we get completely sidetracked in a round of mutual guilt and apologies, why don’t we just agree- there will be special breakfast for those who want it, and anyone who doesn’t fancy it is of course welcome to have whatever they want, or nothing at all. The same for Christmas dinner too.” 

Anne shot her a grateful glance and Cathy felt her shoulders sink in relief.

“So” Catalina began. “An opt-in breakfast and dinner. With every day alternatives for those who prefer. And mutual understanding that it can be a hard day for everyone and that constant Christmas cheer isn’t expected or required from anyone.”

“And” Kitty added, “also that the day itself absolutely isn’t the responsibility of any one person and that no one would dream of thinking it was.”

She looked directly at Jane as she said it; Jane nodded and smiled a little sheepishly, and leant in to Anna again.

“Is there anything else?”

“The lights...” Anne sounded hesitant but her voice gained more strength when no one seemed annoyed or impatient. “Could we maybe….turn them off for a bit? Or find a way to make them just be on or off, not flashing?”

Catalina nodded. “Of course.”

“Oh and-” Everyone looked surprised to hear Jane speaking up; Jane herself looked slightly embarrassed. “I know I was the one playing them but...I  _ really _ hate them.” She cast a pleading look around the room. “Does anyone mind if we stop playing the modern Christmas songs? They’re so irritating. Especially that one about the demon.”

“Which one?” Trust Anne to look interested at that, thought Cathy.

Jane tilted her head. “You know. The one about his impending arrival. About how he watches you all the time-”

“Santa Claus Is Coming to Town?”

“That’s it. Whatever happened to simple carols?”

Catalina nodded. “There  _ was  _ a pleasant simplicity to the old ones. No This is the best day of your life or anything. Just ‘Boar is really delicious, maybe try it with mustard.’ Sensible advice, not this….expectation of jollity.”

“I think they still have that actually-” Kitty broke in. “Except it’s not really tuneful and I don’t think you sing it…”

“Really?”

“I think so. At least, my super noodles said that they were best served with stir fried chicken and sesame oil. But there was only the one verse…”

*

The first Christmas Day that the queens ever celebrated together was, by most standards, an uneventful one.

But no one blinked an eye when Cathy forgoed Anna’s nutella pancakes and Kitty’s strawberry waffles for her usual toast and coffee.

The turkey dinner was, by all accounts, as pretty as the ones on tv. Anne never actually tasted a bite of the turkey itself but praising Jane’s stuffing to the skies more than made up for it.

And Cathy found that when it actually came down to it, it was all a lot less painful than she had imagined: despite her dread, she felt herself genuinely excited about seeing the others open the gifts, and not ambivalent about the beautiful fountain pen, thick fluffy dressing gown, chocolate covered coffee beans (Catalina had shaken her head despairingly at that) and midnight blue boots she’d been given (not to mention a sizeable stack of books from her wishlist). 

Even when Kitty suggested playing a game, she found that the casual “Fancy it Cath? No pressure” made all the difference and she’d been able to join in quite happily. 

And when, mid afternoon, she felt herself becoming slightly overwhelmed and excused herself, Catalina following her into the hall hadn’t felt anywhere near as uncomfortable as it would have done before.

“Ok mija?”

“Yeah just-” She’d shrugged and waved a hand. “It’s a bit much.”

Catalina, rather than looking disappointed or irritated, had just nodded. “That’s understandable. Do you want some space or shall I keep you company?”

“I don’t want to take you away from the fun-”

“You absolutely wouldn’t be doing that. But please don’t feel pressured either way- if you want some time alone, that’s fine.”

“It’s not that I want to be alone, it’s-”

Catalina looked understanding. “How about we relocate to my room for a bit? We can listen to some more of that podcast you like, if you’re up to it?”

Cathy nodded. Curled up under Catalina’s arm, the podcast murmuring quietly in the background, she felt herself start to decompress. Then, a tap at the door made them both sit up- Jane peeked in.

“Can I come in?”

“Sure.”

A little uncomfortable, Jane hovered by the bed. “Would it be ok if I joined you? I promise I won’t talk. The others are going to play scrabble and-”

“Of course” Cathy knew she would nevern ot appreciate Catalina looking to her to answer first. “Although don’t you want to play?”

Jane shook her head. “You know I-”

“Catalina will make a team with you again if you want-” She glanced to her godmother. “Won’t you? Or I will, if the others will hold the game off another fifteen minutes or so-”

Jane shook her head.

“Not that I don’t love teaming up with either of you- I totally appreciate the offer. I just- got to thinking about things. Thought a quiet room would be nice, you know?”

Catalina nodded understandingly and Jane settled gratefully on her other side. After a moment, Catalina wrapped her free arm around her shoulders and Jane leant into her.

After a while, her phone buzzed and she let out a short laugh.

“Sorry, I know I said I wouldn’t interrupt but, look what Kitty just sent me…”

She passed her phone to Catalina.

On the screen, it read:

_ Let us know if we get too noisy! Lots of love to all three of you from all three of us <3 <3 <3 Also Janey, I thought you’d appreciate this more carol I found. _

Catalina clicked on the link and the three listened to the festive sounding if slightly tinny music emanate from the phone speakers.

_ “….angels we have heard on high…..tell us to go out and buy….” _

“Really sums it up, doesn’t it?” murmured Cathy and Catalina smiled.

“Shall I take back your fountain pen then mija?”

“Oh god no!”

Catalina chuckled and squeezed her hand and Cathy burrowed back into her side, listening to the faint sounds of good natured arguing drift up from below, her godmothers heartbeat and Jane's quiet breathing beside her.

Maybe it wasn’t such an awful day after all.

  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> The song that Kitty sends Jane is Tom Lehrer's A Christmas Carol, an excellent song that can be listened to on youtube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IaliZVelWdk (and credit to the excellent @remeinhu for first showing me it!)
> 
> The Tudor Christmas carol that Catalina references is a real carol, first published in Wynkyn de Wordes 1521 book of carols. The whole song can be heard here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7adETaOYiQ   
> For those wondering, the lyrics can be pretty much summed up as 'Boars head is the best dinner ever and it tastes good with mustard'. Its pleasing simplicity is something more christmas songs should aspire to imo.


End file.
